Enda the Line!

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By John Fairclough

Enda the Line!

The phone, well it rang and I got a call,
‘Twas a young working man from Donegal.
He said “Taoiseach thanks for the extra cash”
I asked him his name but he had to dash!

Later that week in Dollymount Strand
I met a man with two pints in his hand.
He said “for your water I never will pay”
What I told him then really made his day!

The price of your beer from behind the bar
Would pay for your water for many an hour.
So I went back to Dublin, to Merrion Square,
A poor homeless man I bumped into there.

I sat on his bench for over two hours,
And told him that housing was beyond our powers.
He wasn’t too happy but I don’t give a damn,
‘Cause I’ll never again meet that homeless man.

Then later in Europe I gave an oration
About how single handed I saved our fair nation.
As the banking crisis was about to get barmy,
I was seconds away from deploying the army!

But wait, that’s not all, there still more to come,
I’ve blamed all our troubles on that David Drumm.
Although I’m not dreaming and I’m not telling lies,
I’m not sure I’ll be here when the Irish arise!